What a week!

One week ago today, we got to take Little Mister home from the hospital. What a crazy week it has been since then. We are so thankful that Memere was here to help with the big kids and help daddy clean out and organize the garage. It looks so much better and we were able to find all (?) of the baby stuff and get it cleaned and ready for Baby.

Sunday night, Sharon, Laena, Braeland and Pam came for a visit and brought dinner from Famous Dave's! So yummy. Hanging outside for a bit:

Monday morning, we had Mac's first well-child appt and Finn's ear follow up. Both appts showed the boys were doing perfectly well. Yay. That afternoon, Daddy, Memere and Korri took Finn to baseball practice and of course, the one day I miss, they PITCHED the ball! Oh, I bet Finn LOVED that.

Tuesday, we had Finn's last (sniff, sniff!) baseball game, which Mac thoroughly enjoyed, snuggled up with daddy.

I'm so glad we signed him up for baseball this summer. It seemed like a HUGE time commitment in the beginning but it just became our routine and he loved every second of it (and he got to meet more kids his age!). NeNe came over in the evening to play with Finn while Memere graciously took Korri to gymnastics, which they all loved.

Wednesday, Jim met Grandpa Ron in Murdock to pick up our lawn mower in order to get it back to our place (we needed a trailer). Then once they got it here, they loaded the trailer back up and headed to Hutchinson to pick up the rest of our bed pieces. Can't wait for that to get installed so our bed/room feels more like it belongs to a "big person." Memere finished up all of her help (again, for which we are beyond grateful) and Grandpa and Memere headed home (sniff, sniff).

Thursday, Pam so kindly invited Jim and the big kids to go boating with their family for the morning, which they did. Finn even went tubing for the first time and LOVED it:

Jim said both kids loved swimming in the middle of the lake, too. I'm so glad my kids aren't afraid of the water. While they were out having fun in the sun, a home health nurse from Allina came to visit Mac and me. We both checked out great. While I wasn't too concerned, it is a nice service. That evening, we had Finn's end of the year baseball picnic/party. It was a bit windy, but Little Mister slept happily in his covered car-seat the entire time! The kids had a blast. Again, I was sad to see the season end, but so excited to see what the rest of the summer holds. After the party, we met Grandma and Austin at our house for Austin/Finn weekend at Grandma's! Korri has been very emotional since Mac was born, so Jim and I were looking forward to some time with just her.

Speaking of, Friday, Jim and Korri had a daddy/daughter date! They both knew they wanted to go shopping and Korri picked Ridgedale, I think to Jim's dismay, as I think he would have preferred MOA. She played in the play area, they got their pictures taken in a photo booth, did a little shopping and had lunch. A perfect date for both of them. Later that evening, Born's came over and brought dinner (in additional to picking up some grocery necessities we were out of!). It was a great evening but holy moly, was I tired by the end!

Saturday, I packed up the kids and met Auntie Kristine and Zander at Lake Rebecca park to play and swim! I may have over done it a bit, but the weather was perfect and Korri and Zander play super well together. Then we headed to our respective houses for nap time and then auntie, uncle Alex and Zander came over for dinner and so Alex could help get the lawn mower started (which he did, but it STILL needs s tune up...will we ever be able to mow our own lawn?!?!). In the afternoon Stacey and Dillon stopped by for a quick snuggle session with Mac!

This morning, I packed the kids up and took them to church by myself! And it went well. There is nothing a bunch of Catholics like more than a newborn! When we got home, NeNe and Uncle Les brought LeAnn Chin over for lunch...yum! Then, I had the pleasure of a long nap. Awesome.

Here is Big Sister giving Baby Mac a 'moochie (through all that hair):

Most importantly (to me!), I finally am feeling somewhat "normal" again! It was a tough week for me physically and somewhat emotionally, as the "baby blues" have reared their ugly head a few times, but so far, doesn't seem to be postpartum depression, although I am very watchful for the signs (given I had it with Korri, I'm much more likely to have it again). Also, I was severely anemic (I think due to the blood loss during birth) but due to side effects, my doctor didn't want me taking an iron supplement. I don't know if you've ever been extremely anemic before but wow...just walking around took more energy than I had (and I was pretty yellow, just like Mac!). The effects of the third degree tear were pretty rough, too, but I am now able to get up and down without cringing, which I think is a victory! And I'm so happy to report that the swelling in my feet seems to finally be gone, for the most part. That was really tough and painful but I noticed on Friday that it seemed to be getting better. They said it would take about a week and I guess one week and one day is close. Overall, well on the way to recovery.

What's in a name?

I'm a little surprised more people haven't asked about Mac's name, but I have a feeling they are thinking it. So, how did we come up with MacKeegan?

Well, one thing that was different this time around was that we had to have two names picked out, a boy and a girl, which we've never had to do before. And if you know Jim and me at all, agreeing on something this important is usually not easy at all! Luckily, we had the girl name picked right after Korri was born. I was watching TV and LOVED the last name of somebody on the show: Maddigan! I love the nickname Maddi and since I love long names that can be shortened and it "fit" with the "gan" theme, it stuck. My only reservation about this name was that it was close to Madison, so I didn't want her having to correct people her whole life. Oh, well. Guess we'll never know for sure. Side note: I love Addi even more, but Addigan didn't really have the same ring. Side side note: this is the name Stacey was able to guess during the rousing game of hangman during delivery. She was very proud of herself!

After Finn was born, Jim and I both loved the name Declan, which is a very traditional Irish name. But oddly, after we got pregnant with #3, neither of us liked it any more, and didn't fall into the "gan" theme, which I think I would have been okay with! Weird. So back to the drawing board. I did some looking around but couldn't find anything that was unique and that I liked enough. Jim randomly looked online one afternoon and said, how about MacKeengan? Yup, that was it without a second thought (although we went back and forth on the spelling, of course!). I've always LOVED the name Keegan (which also has a special place in our sister-in-laws heart!) but as of late, it is WAY too popular for me to name my child that. This was the perfect compromise. Once we picked the name, we knew we wanted his nickname to be Mac but went back and forth on the spelling of that too. Jim felt strongly about it being "Mack" so I agreed, as I didn't really care all that much (I already got the name I loved...and Jim got his spelling for Korri, too!). But right after he was born, Jim said, "It should be Mac." Okay, then! Ha. I guess there is nothing wrong with changing it at that point. I've called him Keegan a few times, which I think is okay, too. I have a feeling it will be Mackey (spelling?) most of the time anyway. Both kids just call him Baby for now, which is too funny. Korri keeps asking what his "long" name is!

Mac is a strong name and MacKeegan means "fire" in Gaelic. I think it will serve him well. Since both big kids have about 10 nicknames, I can't wait to see what his end up being as well! And I'm so glad you decided to be born when you did. I can't imagine how I'd be feeling if I were still pregnant or how big you would have been had you "cooked" for a couple more weeks!

Happy one week birthday, Mac! I can't even describe how much I love you already and how complete you've made our family. Oh, the places you'll go and the things you will do...I can't wait to see and experience them with you. Stealing words from Dr. Seuss:

OH! THE PLACES YOU'LL GO!
You'll be on your way up!
You'll be seeing great sights!
You'll join the high fliers
who soar to high heights.
Today is your day!
Your mountain is waiting.
 So...get on your way!

Mac's Doctor Visit

Mac had his first non-well doctor visit this morning. I noticed last night that he had greenish/yellowish/brownish snot coming out of his nose and green gunk in his left eye. He still ate decently overnight but was taking longer breaks between sucks, probably to accommodate the congestion. And this morning didn't seem too interested in eating at all.

However, all is well! The doctor thinks his eye is because of a plugged tear duct, which the nurses at the hospital said that as well. He gave us a prescription to put in Mac's eye when it gets gunky but it is something that he might have to "deal with" for several months and sometimes up to a year. I am to massage the inside of the eye socket near his nose, too, when it is gunky, as that might help loosen it up.

As for his nose, probably related to the drainage (or lack thereof) of his eye. It could also be a symptom of a little cold (since three people in our house have colds). I just have to sucker his nose before feedings and that should help, which I'm already doing.

So, overall not a big deal. I just figured I'd better call since he is SO young. He weighed in at a whopping 8 lbs 12.5 oz...1 oz shy of his birth weight, which he is "supposed" to be back to by one week, which is tomorrow! I can't believe it. It is such a blessing to have a good eater. I hope it continues. The doctor thinks his belly button nubbin will fall off today or tomorrow. Yay! But we should continue to put Vaseline on his circumcision site until his two week well child appt next week. He also thinks his bilirubin levels have probably improved since his appt on Monday! Another yay!

One week tomorrow? Wow.

And because we have two other adorable children in our family, big siblings playing in the new pool daddy got for them!

Mac's Well Child

Sunday was a nice and quiet day. Mac did great and the big kids were so happy to have us home. Thank you to Sharon, Laena, Braeland and Pam for visiting and to Sharon for bringing us Famous Dave's for dinner! So thoughtful and appreciated.

Bright and early Monday morning...okay 9:30, we had Mac's first well child appt. Jim was able to schedule Finn's ear follow up at the same time, which was SO helpful. Basically, Mac is perfect, even given his slightly early arrival into this world! There was nothing of concern at all. So happy to hear that. They took his blood for his bilirubin levels and while they were still elevated at 13.9, they would have needed to be around 19 for them to treat. That means we don't need to do anything special until his two week well child! He had gained 3 oz, which is AMAZING, which brought him back up to 8 lbs 8 oz. The dr was so happy with that that he said Mac can go up to 4 hours at night between eatings, if he is sleeping! Sweet! So so so happy about the whole visit.

Finn's left ear had healed and the tube was still in (we already knew the right one had come out, but that one wasn't infected)! We couldn't believe it. That means it was just an infection and NOT his ear drum rupturing. The dr said that "most" kids don't need tubes once they are in kindergarten, but then again, Finn doesn't usually follow the path of "most" kids when it comes to medical things. The Dr said we will need to watch him through this cold and flu season and if he does well (has less than 3 infections in 6 months), we can probably say he won't need new tubes! I'm praying for that to be true as I'm really not comfortable with a third set. Finn did a great job and was showing off the whole time!

Basically, Mac is doing great, sleeping lots and eating well. I'm so happy he seems to have figured out this eating thing, after two horrific experiences with my first two. He isn't eating even close to the supply I have, so I am trying to be patient for that to even out on its own (I've only pumped twice since coming home). I finally got a nursing app to help me remember when, which side and how long he eats and that helped a lot for me (too much to remember). Nights have been really good so far...but then again, he is sleeping almost all the time, so I'm not sure how long it will continue.

I don't think I mentioned that Korri got a cold on Thursday (the day he was born) and Jim and Finn got a cold on Friday! I've been hoping and praying that neither I nor Mac got it but last night, Mac was congested, lots of extra snot and a congested eye. Argh! I'm hoping it doesn't turn into anything but will probably call the dr just to be sure. Darn germs! And I feel everybody has been trying so hard to wash hands and use germ lotion. I guess you can only do so much to prevent these things. Hopefully just a "normal" cold, if there is such a thing with a 6 day old!

And because who doesn't love a baby video, here is Mac sucking his thumb last night, which he figured out all by himself! What a little sucker...LOL!

Finn had his last baseball game yesterday. I can't believe how quickly the season went by! When I signed him up, I thought it was going to be more of an inconvenience than it was. Finn had a blast all season and I think learned a few things. I was/am really proud of him for how well he listened and paid attention, especially for a five year old when all the other boys were dinking around (he did, too, but not nearly as much!). It was disappointing that it was tee-ball instead of baseball, but that starts at age 7, I guess. Hoping to get Korri in next year, even though she will be half a year too young. Here is Mac and daddy watching the game:

Mac's First Day(s)

Mac had an interesting first couple of days. After birth, they checked his blood sugar levels as is procedure for the size he was. They were borderline at 41, and have to be above 41 to be considered normal. So that means he was pricked every one to two hours for the next 24-36 hours to continue testing his levels. They ranged between 50 and 32 over the next day and until he had three in a row above 41, they continued. It was really tough because he was not bleeding very much and who wants their newborn to be not only pricked that often, but in clear pain when they squeezed and pinched for more blood.

Finally, they were not happy with the progress he was making, so they asked me to supplement his feedings with formula. As you can imagine based on my past history with feeding my babies, I just lost it...sobbing uncontrollably. They started with having me self-express, which is painful but did produce a little colostrum, and having Jim give him formula after each feeding as well. My nurse was amazing and offered me lavender aroma therapy and massaged my neck, shoulders, legs and feet. She wanted me to relax so I could sleep, which I finally did.

After a few self-expression sessions, they agreed that I could just start pumping after feeding Mac to make sure we were getting as much as possible out of each side and to get more to give to him after. Finally, my milk came in yesterday, Saturday, so we were able to slowly ween the formula and just give him the extra pumped milk! Yay.

Also, in the first day he lost 5% of his body weight. While losing weight is normal, losing this much in one day is much higher than "normal." But with the extra food he was getting, they weren't overly concerned. And this morning, he'd only lost another 1% so they were happy to see that. He should start gaining weight again after about a week. He latches on so well and now that my milk is in (and that he has reserve weight!), I don't think we have much to worry about with that.

Friday, the rounding pediatrician noticed that Mac was a little yellow, even though it was hard to tell with how red he was, and told us to have the natural sun shine in on him as much as possible. Then Saturday morning, as is normal procedure, I think, they checked his bilirubin levels which came back as high risk. The extra food he was getting would help his body get rid of the extra levels but he needed to be under the light therapy and would NOT be going home Saturday. This was very disappointing for us as Finn and Korri were REALLY ready for the three of us to come home AND because I was discharged Saturday just after noon. But the really nice thing about our hospital is they have a "rooming in" policy where if your baby has to stay longer than mom, you just stay in your room until baby comes home! SO NICE. One of the nurses did comment that it was nice we were pretty calm with all the changes and needing stay longer. Ha, this is nothing!

He was under the lights all day yesterday and all last night. The really hard part about him being under the lights is that we can't hold him when he cries (he could only be out when he ate)! Eventually we realized we could position him on his side or tummy because he HATED being on his back and not swaddled. That helped. They had him in the nursery over night because since we would be sleeping, we wouldn't be able to make sure his goggles stayed on (and I would get more sleep!). This morning, they rechecked his levels and they dropped slightly, which was enough to let him come home as long as he is rechecked tomorrow for his levels! AWESOME. So excited to go home, which should be by late morning! He just had his circumcision and he NOT happy. Hopefully he feels better soon, poor guy!!

Overall, he is doing great and LOVES to snuggle and be held. I think his big sister is going to LOVE that as all she has talked about is holding the baby for forever, even if she really wanted a baby sister instead of another brother! Thank you to everybody for the kind words and support over the last couple of days and over the trying months of this pregnancy. We'd love visitors so just get in touch with Jim or myself if you have some free time or want to meet Mac!

Mac snuggling on mommy's lap early this morning while I was pumping.

Party of Five!

Short version? MacKeegan (Mac) John joined our family at 11pm on Thursday, July 17 weighing 8 pounds 13 ounces and 19 3/4 inches long at 37 weeks and 1 day of gestation.

Long (LONG) version? Mac's actual birth started with my OB appt on Thursday at 10 am. I had progressed to a dilation of 5 centimeters and 80% effaced. My doctor did a manual exam of my belly and thought the baby was measuring at 9 pounds 1 ounce. She did strip my membranes but wasn't sure it would do too much since I'd had so many cervical exams already. She basically said she would be happy delivering Babygan any time since we were over 37 weeks (but couldn't do more than she had since we weren't 39 weeks) and to come in if I had a window when my contractions were consistently 5 minutes apart, as they could call that "real" labor and break my water. 

So after, Jim decided not to go to St. Paul for work, the four of us went shopping and have lunch. During lunch I started charting my contractions between 3 and 6 minutes apart (not exactly consistent but still frequent). We went home so the kids could nap. Finally at 3:30, Jim convinced me to call in. They told me to come in right away. So Jim figured out plans for the kids (they went to our neighbor Beth's and Memere, who was already on her way, would pick them up there) and we went in. I still had the sense that they would assess me and send us home, like they'd done so many times before, but I didn't want to miss our opportunity either.

By the time we got there (around 4:30 pm), contractions were between 2 and 4 minutes apart and I was at 5.5 dilation. The charge nurse was NOT comfortable sending me home and talked with my doctor, who just happened to be on call! They agreed to check me in an hour and make a plan. After that hour, I was to a 6 and the decision was made to move us into a Labor and Delivery room and get this party started. I still didn't fully believe that we were going to have a baby presently, but thought things would slow down and they would change their mind and send us home.

We decided to have me walk around the halls for a bit, get the process for epidural started and wait for my doctor to come meet with us. Finally when the epidural had been ordered, I asked the nurse if we were going to have this baby tonight and she said either tonight or tomorrow morning! So, now things were real. Stacey joined us as photographer and support. Jim was told he had 30 minutes before the epidural so he ran out to get some food...and the anesthesiologist was there in 15 minutes instead. So he came right back, because he knew that the process wouldn't be pleasant for me and wanted to be there. After the epidural, things calmed down for a bit so Jim ran out to Taco John's to get dinner for him and Stacey, thinking nothing would happen any time soon.   They completely screwed up Jim's order.

However, my doctor came in, checked me and decided it was time to break my water (around 7p m). So, Jim missed that, oh, well. Better that then the birth! LOL. My water has always broken at home, so this was a new experience for me. She basically checked my cervix and while in there, slipped a crochet-like hook in and broke the water bag. There was a HUGE rush of water. I couldn't see it, but I could hear it and they had to move my legs out of the way of it all! Guess I did have extra fluid.

After that it was a wait and see kind of game with enough time for my doctor to go home for dinner. At this point, Stacey decided she should really get to know the baby's name, so Jim and she started a rousing game of hangman...with her getting to pick a letter every half hour. Honestly, this sounds silly but really made the time pass quickly and kept things light. My doctor came back after dinner and around 9 pm, I noticed my contractions were moving into my lower back (yay for back contractions, NOT!) and getting stronger. So at that point, I started upping the epidural, which I could do every 5 minutes, for which Stacey and Jim helped time for me so I wouldn't lose any time or relief.

The nurse checked me a little bit later and I was fearful that there had been no change but she quickly put that fear to rest when she said I was at a 9! Sweet. Now I knew it wouldn't be too long but still not sure if it would be Thursday night or Friday morning (both Jim and I were thinking Friday morning). A bit later, the nurse checked me again and said she wanted the doctor to check. Dr. Teri came in, checked me and said it was time to push! Wait, what?!?! This was around 10:45 pm.

So they got things ready and I started pushing. I'd somewhat forgotten how HARD you have to push but they were so encouraging I felt like I had a team of cheerleaders there just for me. After a couple pushes, something clearly was wrong, but they weren't entirely sure if it was with me or baby so they gave me an oxygen mask. I decided to focus just on what I could control and not worry (as it wouldn't help and I'd lose my focus) but I knew the baby's pulse was very low (in the 50's at one point instead of a normal 150's or higher). Eventually, Dr. Teri said it was like the baby was holding his breath, so we had time before things were critical. But in the same breath, she had a team of nurses in our room, Jim was relieved of his duty of holding my leg/foot and she ordered the Operating Room to get ready for an emergency C-section. She was elbow deep trying to move the baby's head and decided we had one more opportunity to do this together before surgery. She grabbed the forceps and she told me to push like I'd never pushed before. We timed the next contraction and both gave it our all. On the third push (we'd been doing three pushes each time), I felt things shifting and out he came at 11:00 pm. Holy moly, I'd forgotten how great it feels when the baby actually comes out! Yes, for those still paying attention, that was 15 minutes of pushing.

At this point, is when I started thinking about what could be wrong with baby. He was put directly on my chest and the words I heard were, "good color", "doesn't look bad", "doesn't need extra help" etc. Ah, words every mother wants to hear. Oh, and a great big cry!! All good things. But since I was focusing on that, I didn't know what we'd had! Finally after about two minutes (in my world, I really have no idea how long!), I said, "Wait, is it s a boy or girl?" And they all laughed and said, "BOY!" Too funny. Since he was on my chest, I couldn't see the rest of his body.

From there, all things were pretty routine. After I got some snuggles, they took him with daddy over to the warmer to get his vitals and check him over. The nurses kept saying how big he was, so I was curious to find out exactly HOW big. He was a little smaller than all things were indicating but still big: 8 pounds 13 ounces, 19 3/4 inches and 14 inch head circumference...definitely all big for 37 weeks! They like to get mom and baby moved to their post-partum room within 2 hours. After I was stitched back up (a third degree tear, made worse by my previous third degree tear with Korri!), they removed the epidural (when I fainted for the first time, but was in bed, so they just laid me back) and started getting my fluids and toast (I hadn't eaten since lunch!). They wanted me to urinate before they moved me but my legs were still pretty shaky, so they had this little "walker" type thing and the nurse assisted me. I made it to the bathroom and on the toilet and then fainted again, keep in mind, before this I don't think I'd ever fainted before. She yelled for assistance and they got me in a wheelchair and decided to wheel me to my new room. I was told I fainted two more times before they got me to my room and in bed. Yikes! Probably a combination of blood loss and low blood pressure.

I was able to nurse Mac right away and he latched on like a champ (my nurse was very helpful with all of it). It was after 2 am by the time I was able to go to sleep. They took Mac to the nursery for the night so I could get as much sleep as possible.

I'm sure there are tons of details that I've glossed over but you clearly get the point. Overall, we are just so happy and thankful that we have a healthy baby. All pictures will be uploaded to our picture website as time allows, but here is one from this morning with daddy and Mac doing skin-to-skin:

Super baby

Yesterday my OB appt showed no cervix change (of course). However, the doctor was concerned because my belly was measuring at FORTY-ONE weeks and I'm only 36. So she scheduled a growth scan ultrasound for last night (it was the earliest I could get in). Stacey and Dillon graciously met us at the hospital so Jim and I could go without kiddos. The US showed that Babygan is measuring at 40w 2d, which is almost exactly 4 weeks ahead and is in the 98th percentile for size! My fluid levels showed normal (usually they show high) but baby was super active, so it is hard for them to get an accurate measure of fluid. Basically Babygan is measuring at 8 lbs 12 oz with a +/- of 20 oz (could range between 7lbs 8oz to 10lbs.). And we are four weeks early! Yikes. My doctor doesn't seem concerned but we are all hoping I deliver sooner rather than later for risk of needing to deliver an 11+ lbs baby! This is something I've never had to worry about before and honestly, I'm not very comfortable or happy with it, but there is nothing I can do about it either (I guess bigger is better than smaller but I'm not looking forward to all the comments either). It is in God's hands and we just continue to pray that my water breaks or these contractions actually start doing something to my cervix. Here's hoping for an eventful week!

Also, happy birthday to Grandma/Mom/Kathy! Hope you have an awesome day.

Fourth times the charm?

Nope! So I know I said I wasn't going back into the hospital until my water broke or the baby was coming out. And since my water hasn't broke yet, that should tell you how painful and uncomfortable contractions were yesterday since I did go in last night, which for those keeping track, is my FOURTH trip to the hospital for labor symptoms. They started regularly around 4:30 and by 5:30, I was at a 5, possibly 6, on the pain chart and to this point, they have never progressed to that point. They were about 3 minutes apart. After Korri's gymnastics (which is where I was when all of this was happening...thank God Lynn was here to help Korri!), we decided to all go to dinner. I mean, again, what's the point. However all through dinner, I was clearly having issues, so Lynn and Ron (who just happened to be in town for Finn's baseball game) stayed and Jim and I went to the hospital.

What happened? Yup, you guessed it...no change! Still at a 4.5. I just don't get it. I mean, women go in with less painful and further apart contractions and come home with a baby. They monitored me for a little over an hour and then asked if I wanted to stay or go home. Well, duh...why stay if nothing was happening?!?! I was SO sure it was time. I woke up several times last night due to contractions, which again, is a new thing since they haven't been bad enough to wake me up.

So Ron and Lynn went home late last night, but are "on call" should anything change. Jim asked if he should stay home today (he is working in St. Paul) but again, I just don't see the point. So, I'm at home alone with the kids today, having significant contractions but probably "only" a 3 or so. ARGH! Okay, I'm done complaining. I'll probably be complaining about how little sleep I'm getting in a few weeks but if these contractions keep me up as much as they did last night...I'd rather be up because I'm taking care of my baby! Oh, and we are 36 weeks today, which is SO much better than 32. I just keep praying that God agrees that it is time to meet this little munchkin and allows my water to break...soon! Next OB appt is tomorrow, so I'll update if anything changes...but don't hold your breath!

How do you know you've been to the hospital too much? The charge nurse greets you by name and you comment on her new hair cut!

Hurry up and wait

First off, let it be known that I'm so thankful and happy that Babygan has continued to "cook" for longer than 32 weeks, when I first went into the hospital. Every day means that much bigger, healthier and less time in the NICU. However, unless you've been in my position (which I've now been in twice), you honestly have no idea what it is like to be in labor but not laboring for weeks on end, never knowing if or when things will change. The mental game is exhausting, especially since I have to weigh the risk/reward of not going in if it is nothing compared to the fact that I labored for 4.5 hours with Korri, which isn't a long time! I know I sound like I'm whining and I feel bad/guilty about that, but it is what it is.

That being said, I've been having more significant contractions over the last day or so. This afternoon they were fairly regular and as close as four minutes apart. Did I go in? Of course not! Especially since I had an OB check this afternoon. The doctor checked me and I'm now dilated to a 4.5 or 5 and 80% effaced. Baby's head is still somewhat high, but she said that doesn't really matter in terms of whether or not you are in labor or going into labor shortly.

So, she sent me home to wait it out to see what happens. Yet again, we could have a baby tonight...or it could be in three weeks! Argh. But silver lining? Mommy and Babygan are fine physically and there is no reason for concern at this point. I guess we'll see what the next day or so brings! Thanks for all of your continued thoughts, well wishes and prayers. It is in God's hands, which I need to keep reminding myself.

Ruptured drum?

Mr. Finnegan complained that his ear hurt yesterday around lunch time. I haven't really worried about ear infections since we put semi-permanent tubes in nearly two years ago. He seemed tired and a little weepy but took a nap just fine, so I didn't think much of it. Well around snack time, I noticed there was a LOT of green stuff coming out of his left ear. Even with all of his ear infections of the past, never had this happened before. I tried to wipe the outer ear with a tissue and he started crying hysterically. I promptly gave his some ibuprofen and called his Dr. I didn't know what to expect since it was nearly 4pm already but much to my surprise and relief, they got him in at 4:30.

So, off Jim and Finn went to the doctor. The Dr. wasn't able to actually see inside Finn's left ear due to swelling and "junk" being in there but the right tube was out. I am not happy to hear this since both tubes were fine in March for his well-child check. Given the fact that the Dr. couldn't see what was going on, he surmised that either Finn's ear drum ruptured OR he has massive pressure/infection that was plugging the tube and it is now draining. I've never had my ear drum rupture but I've heard it is VERY painful. Regardless of what is going on, the Dr. put Finn on ear drops for 10 days. We got two doses in last night and he said his ear felt a little better this morning. He seems to be feeling better, too. And as long as TV is on, he does really well with the drops, which I'm very thankful for (we've had our share of screaming matches around ear drops in the past!).

We will go back in a few weeks so the Dr. can make sure all is healed and also see if the tube is still in. Now this momma gets to worry about recurring ear infections again! Argh. Although, I feel like there is an age where most kids out grow ear infections and I'm hoping and praying that Finn is at that magical age. I guess we will see. If something has to rupture in this house, not sure what is better: Finn's ear or my membranes! For now, Babygan continues to stay put, even though contractions continue!

Side story, I was going out to dinner last week and noticed a baby turtle next to the driveway. I text Jim about it, thinking the kids would like to see it. Well, when I got home, Jim said that it was all dried out and even though it was a snapping turtle (Jim typically wouldn't save a snapping turtle), he and the kids brought it over to the marshy area. But the cutest part? The kids said they were the Wonder Pets saving a turtle! If you don't know this show, there are three animals that save other animals. I just thought that was really cute.

OB update

The short? No change! The long? My doctor is shocked that I'm still pregnant! She said not only that there isn't a change, she would say it has even somewhat improved (probably just because my contractions have leveled out)...still dilated to 4 and about 60% effaced. Contractions continue but the medication has helped manage the "tightening" ones that don't do anything. But then again, I was about this same stage for four weeks with Korri, so who knows?!?! She thinks I'll deliver within the next two weeks but again, the point is we just don't know. She also said that they would most likely induce me at 38 weeks (which would be 7/23) due to the progress/point I'm at. Good to know, I guess. So more of the same...wait and see. While I'm happy baby hasn't been born because a full term baby is always better, the mental strain this back and forth is taking a toll on me. For my sake, I'd rather just have Babygan, but for Babygan's sake, another three weeks would be best. So we just keep on keepin' on like we have been doing!

Celebrating with sadness

We made it! Today marks two very important things in my life: making it to 34 weeks in this pregnancy and one year since my dad passed away.

Obviously 34 weeks isn't our end goal, but it is HUGE that we made it this far, especially considering the events of the last week or two. Now, when I go into labor, Babygan SHOULD be able to stay at Buffalo Hospital with me and not have to be transported to Children's. That is a huge weight off my mind. I had some pretty major contractions last night but they went away after medication and rest. So, we are good for now. I'll be curious to see if there has been any progress or changes at my OB check tomorrow.

Secondly, today marks one year since my dad passed away. There are certain events that change your life forever. This is one of them for me. It was so unexpected and tore me apart at my core. When you don't have a picture perfect relationship with somebody and then they are taken from you, it is horrible. That being said, it also gave me the perspective on how much I truly loved him and the impact he had on my life, even if it wasn't what I thought I needed at the time. My dad was always there to help, watch and listen. There have been so many moments in the last year where I've thought, "I just need to ask dad" but then I can't. People say that time heals all wounds and while I certainly am in a better place than I was a year ago, I don't think I'll "get over" my dad dying. I just want another hug. I just want my kids to have one more visit to play on his dump truck or backhoe. I wish he could have met and held my unborn child. I wish he would have gone to the doctor just ONCE so we knew what was going on but in true dad fashion, he died like he lived his life...on his own terms and in his own way.

Dad, I will miss you until my dying day. You weren't perfect but you were my dad. Thank you for teaching me the value of hard work, loyalty and being a kind person. You are missed so much. I know you are watching over us. I'm glad you are just a prayer away. I love you so much!

Sprung

We are free. From the hospital at least. We are 33 weeks and 3 days today.

Last night contractions were irregular but seemed stronger. I requested to be put back on the monitor to check late last night and the nurse wasn't too concerned even though contractions were TWO minutes apart. Sheesh. Enough already. I was able to go right to sleep and slept well, so they obviously weren't too bad.

This morning they started talking about sending me home today or tomorrow. They checked my cervix and I was still at a 4 but 60% effaced. Since all these contractions aren't dilating me and after a lengthy conversation with the Perinatologist, they put me on a medication that should eliminate the "minor" contractions but not labor if that is what my body needs to do. So basically, treating the contraction symptoms but not preventing labor.

Given all that, Jim and I were fine with going home. The short term goal is to get me to Wed at which time I will be 34 weeks and it is likely Babygan can stay at Buffalo with me (it is a level 2 NICU). The next goal would be to make it to 35 weeks at which time baby statistically has considerably fewer complications with breathing and eating. After that, the goal is 37 weeks and beyond. We will take whatever we can get.

It feels so good to be home, even if it feels empty without the kiddos here. They went back with mom on Friday for the weekend and a family reunion. I have my next Dr appt on Thursday so I really hope there is nothing to report before then. Will update before if events warrant it.

Thank you Kristine, Stacey, Dillon, DeAnn, and Laura for visiting. It was a long three days and company always makes it go by faster. And double thank you to Laura for bringing Jim lunch. Options are limited. Until next time.

Friday mini-update

They checked my cervix late this morning and while contractions were about 2-3 minutes apart, there had been no change with my cervix (still dilated to a 4 and about 30% effaced). Even though the contractions didn't appear to be moving things along, they are not happy with how close they were, so they decided to keep me here for the day. They took me off the monitor (yay!) so I was actually able to shower (oh, so happy for the sweet simple things in life!). They will monitor me again this evening to see how things are doing. Over the last hour, contractions have become a little more intense, so I guess we will see.

This morning, it sounded like they are not comfortable sending me home as long as I'm contracting until I'm 34 weeks, which is when we would be able to deliver baby at Buffalo Hospital. So, worse case scenario, we will be here until Wednesday. Again, not sure what best case scenario is...a healthy baby, I guess!

Jim and I are catching up on Orange in the New Black. I'm so thankful for my husband for a million reasons but one is how tech savvy he is! You should see the cords he rigged to get Netflix on the hospital TV!

Another day, another hospital, not another baby

I miss my morning snuggles with my kiddos! Small price to pay for a healthy baby but the last few days have been trying to say the least.

So, to elaborate on Jim's eloquent post from last night, we are currently at Abbott Northwestern Hospital in Minneapolis. Here are the details leading up to this unplanned stay. As you know, since last Friday, I was told to ignore the "tightening" contractions and only pay attention to "painful" ones that were regular. I was contracting all week but nothing had really changed.

Until Wednesday (which feels like Friday to me for some reason!). We had a busy day, which I'm sure didn't help. On and off I noticed that I was contracting but with our schedule I just kept moving. Finally around 7:30, when I sat down for dinner, I definitely noticed the contractions felt "different." Over the course of the evening, I was having some difficulties but the kids had to get to bed (which I don't think ever happened!). Jim and I sat down in bed, he noticed I was struggling and asked me to call the Birth Center. I agreed because I knew he wouldn't leave me alone if I didn't. The nurse basically said to come in right away. Argh!

Thankfully, Stacey was just waiting at home for our call and came right over! The kids were still up when we left around 10:30pm (poor Stacey!) but I'm sure they crashed shortly after. We got to the hospital around 11pm. I was definitely contracting. The first thing that I really liked and appreciated was that the charge nurse took the time to give us a summary of what to expect for the next few hours and different scenarios that could play out. VERY helpful for us. They started with a cervical exam that was also repeated an hour later. Knowing I had been dilated to 1 cm and 25% effaced with the cervix/baby being really high, the nurse did an exam and I could tell things were different. She said, "Well, you aren't a 1 any more." My first thought? Oh, it closed back up! Nope. She said the baby's head was low, and I was now dilated to a 3. They put me on the monitors and would check me again in an hour.

The details are a bit sketchy to me now, but an hour later, she checked me again and I was to a 4 and 30% effaced. Time to call the doctor in, who just happens to be the husband of my doctor. They decided to transfer me to Abbott and against my pleading, they put me on magnesium to slow the contraction for the trip. Yes, for those keeping track, that is three pregnancies with three doses of magnesium. Yuck. It took a while for the ambulance to get to Buffalo. Jim headed home to pick some things up and meet me at Abbott. The hour long trip was very bumpy...I think my new crusade is going to be making sure shocks are installed in all ambulances! Sheesh.

We arrived around 3am and the perinatologist immediately discontinued the magnesium! Thank God! They haven't checked my cervix since arriving at Abbott because it really wouldn't have changed their actions and they wanted to avoid stimulating labor. Contractions have been somewhat consistent but after the magnesium, less intense. The goal was to watch me yesterday and then send me home today if nothing changed or labor wasn't imminent.

So first thing this morning, I asked to go on the monitor...and they weren't happy with what they saw. While the contractions aren't painful for the most part (except one that was at my tail bone and had me nearly in tears), they are 3-4 minutes apart. So, I'm staying on the monitor for a couple hours and then they will assess my progress and whether or not I can go home.

I'm not sure exactly WHAT scenario we are praying for (staying here and having baby or going home) but just that baby is healthy regardless of what happens. The limbo is killing me. So thankful for Stacey and my mom for helping us in so many ways. Being grateful doesn't even come close to how we feel. Will update again when we know more!

Back to Where We Belong

Sitting here awake which is my norm when spending time at Abbott Northwestern Hospital, I am feeling nostalgic.  Feeling nostalgic and not sleeping, I took the opportunity to re-read the blog posts from our first journey here with Finn which started in December 2008.  When we were publishing those regular updates as a way of therapy and to simply keep people informed, I had no clue what those posts might mean to me in the future.  In the middle of reading to them, I was struck with the realization that our words documenting those struggles are now words of comfort along our current path.  With that in mind, I thought it would be prudent to make sure to capture a snapshot of this moment as we never know how it may be helpful.

By way of update for those of you who may be interested and may not have heard, I took Stacy to Buffalo Hospital on Wednesday evening with preterm labor symptoms and she was transferred by ambulance to Abbott early Thursday morning where we've been hanging out since then.  She is doing well as is the yet to be born Babygan.  Thank you so much to everyone who has helped out and supported us with everything so far!

Since we were last here with Finn and most recently with Korri, the facility has undergone an amazing transformation.  Abbott and Children's collaborated in establishing the Mother and Baby Center which is where we are currently staying.  The Center is attached directly to Children's Hospital.  It is a beautiful place and much more comfortable than the previous accommodations.  The level of care and attention is still as phenomenal as ever.

When we moved to Waverly and decided to have another child, while I realized it was a distinct possibility with our history, I didn't REALLY think we'd end up back here in this same (but different) place in Minneapolis; but there is no where we would rather be given the circumstances.  With Stacy having stabilized since the transfer and not progressing any further toward delivery, we actually have mixed emotions about what appears to be her inevitable discharge on Friday.  We know that it is best for Babygan to have every day possible to grow before being born, however it is still likely baby will be early and if that's the case we'd rather be early here!  Thankfully, both doses of steroids for lung development have been given for some time now and the magnesium that was used to stop the labor is good for preventing neural bleeds for baby; Buffalo Hospital is equipped to have a 34 week baby so all things considered we are in a good situation either way.

During the re-read of Finn's story, I noted that I posted the following five days before Finn was born (his gestational age at the time was 25 weeks and one day): "We are now hoping for 61 more days (of gestation) as a best case scenario. At that point, she (Stacy) would be at 34 weeks and they would induce labor."  We didn't make it there with Finn obviously, but knowing that with this pregnancy we are now just FIVE days away from what we thought at the time would have been Finn's best case scenario is extremely comforting and amazing.

As I sit here, I am wearing a t-shirt that I hastily grabbed on our way out the door to head to Buffalo Hospital.  It is perhaps no coincidence that it turned out to be my March of Dime's NICU reunion shirt with Children's logo emblazoned on the back.  While I would desperately love to actually get to 40 weeks just once, I am overcome with emotion and gratitude thinking about the miracle that is Finn.  I am appreciative beyond any means of communication in the medical advancements made possible by organizations like the March of Dimes and medical providers like Abbott and Children's which helped make Finn's life possible and make a positive outcome for our current journey very likely.  If this is to be the story of our final pregnancy it is fitting that we are here in this place with this set of circumstances with Babygan continuing to grow in the same Garden as did Finn...and that I'm wearing this t-shirt.

Future Olympian?

Yesterday was Korri's first night of gymnastics. It is the same program she and Finn did this spring but without Finn this time (he obviously picked baseball instead). It is parent participation, so I don't know how long I'll be able to take her but the teachers helped out a lot. And let me tell you, taking a child to a sports class who truly wants to go, listens and does well is so rewarding! Korri was a champ. She started out walking unassisted on the beams on the floor, then she did the high beam and by the end of the rotation, she was doing high kicks on the high beam and only holding on occasionally! And she loved every minute, other than warm ups when you are supposed to tell you knees to stay straight while bending (hard to do if you aren't super flexible). Then at the end, they did hand stands against the wall, to which Korri walked up and just did it. A feat which she repeated for Jim after we got home with no hesitation. She said her favorite part was the uneven bars where they climbed up a slide, hung on to the bar and then slid down the slide.

Like I told Jim when I got home last night, I don't think either of our children will end up being world-class athletes by any means, but it is so much fun to seem them participating in activities that they enjoy so much and do so well. I'm just thankful they both have SOME ability, so they might actually stick with something.

New bed (kind of) arrived yesterday! It was supposed to be here when we got home from baseball but there was a mix up on inventory and scheduling the delivery, so they fixed the problem and delivered our mattresses and we are "borrowing" their bases until ours arrive. The bad part is only half of the bed adjusts but this morning was the first morning in a long time where my feet actually weren't swollen (or bad at least!). The kids love it. It is higher than I thought it would be but once the other base comes and the headboard and frame arrive, it should look pretty good. So happy.

Take me out to the ball game

On Babygan's front, no news is good news. I continue to contract but "painful" ones are irregular, so we just keep on, keepin' on. I have my weekly shot and check on Thursday AM, so hopefully no news/changes again!

Yesterday was Finn's first day of baseball. We weren't given much information beforehand but figured out what to bring and where to go. Jim took the day off and was able to go with us, which was really nice. They worked on catching and throwing. The coach's "rules" are to 1. learn 2. safety and 3. have fun. I like that! Finn had a blast and did really well! There are about 15 kids aged 5 to 6. I know Finn has been looking forward to baseball but for those of you who remember his participation issues in the past, I wasn't sure what the expect. He did GREAT! He partially listened (there may have been some playing in the dirt between catches), his skills were par or above average (which surprised us since catching and throwing are his weaker skills) and most importantly, he participated right away, all the way and with a happy heart! I think Jim and I told him 20 times how proud we were of him for his good attitude. I think it helps that it is something he LOVES to do but even that doesn't guarantee a good outcome. He's the one by home plate, squatting down.

The field is at Waverly Lake which has a public beach and playground! Huh, how long have we lived here and didn't know about this? So the kids are excited to play at the park and go swimming but I found out yesterday that baseball is Mon-Thurs from 1-2 pm until the end of July! I was told those were the beginning hours and once games started, it would be less of a time commitment. Oh, well. We'll figured it out.

We got Finn a new, little bigger glove for this year, so Korri got to have Finn's old one. Since daddy was there, he played catch with her, which I thought was super cute. It didn't hold her attention too long, but this momma would LOVE for her to play softball someday! Gotta love the dress and all!

And finally, today is the day! This morning was our last morning snuggling in our old, small bed! Our new, king sized, adjustable bed is being delivered today. Me and my feet can't wait! The kids are excited too because it has a remote...I think we will have to set clear rules right away with that. Finding high quality Twin XL sheets has proven nearly impossible, so we just got cheap ones at Walmart yesterday so at least we have sheets. Oh, the problems we have! LOL. Here's hoping for an amazing night's sleep tonight and comfy snuggles in the morning!

Three trips in three days

Three trips to the hospital in three days, I think you all would agree, is too many. And hopefully the last for a while. The first trip was Thursday (and technically I had TWO trips Thursday but the first was just to my clinic which just happens to be in the hospital). We had the first steroid shot and an ultrasound to look at baby's size and fluid levels, but you already know that.

Well, Friday (32 weeks, 2 days; Friday the 13th AND a full moon!) was a lazy day, which was good, but not good enough. By the time I got the kids down for nap around 2:30, I finally was able to rest and put my feet up, at which time I realized I'd been contracting. Since I was in bed, I was able to time the contractions, which I don't think is an easy thing to do (when does it stop, start, how long, how painful, etc). Right away they were 6 minutes apart but they seemed to fluctuate between 6 and 10 minutes. I finally called in at 4:15 because I was afraid my doctor had gone home for the day. She hadn't gone home yet but they transferred me to the Birth Center, I think for expedience sake. I talked to the charge nurse and she said without monitoring me, she couldn't be sure what was happening. Well, since I just happened to be going in at 5:30 for my second steroid shot, we both agree that I should be monitored when I got in.

Thank God, Angie and Erica were already going to come over and were so kind and flexible to meet us at the hospital instead. I was expecting a quick shot and maybe 20 minutes on the contractions monitor. That didn't happen as my contractions were actually 5-6 minutes apart NOT 6-10 like I thought (see I was missing one every so often!). And they continued to intensify and shorten to 4 minutes while I was there. Argh. Angie took the kids to dinner (again, THANK YOU!), Stacey came to pick kids up to bring to our house, as Angie was actually on her way back to Benson. DeAnn headed to our house to help put the kids to bed and Jim's flight finally landed and he came straight to the hospital. Talk about a lot of coordinating. And yet again, makes us realize what amazing, supportive people we have in our lives. Thank you so much each of you for changing your plans, dropping everything and helping us out.

Selfie waiting to see what the contractions were going to do (I think my face says it all):

Back to the contractions, eventually, they gave me Terbutaline around 8:15 pm to stop the contractions and it worked in 10 minutes. They sent us home with instructions for me to "do nothing" the rest of the night and monitor any changes. Well, around 9:30, I started noticing contractions again, so I went up to bed and they were around 4.5 minutes apart over the next two hours. I decided to go to sleep but wasn't able to STAY asleep, which is when I called back. (BTW: Jim said he is very proud of me for not only calling in once but twice!) Back in we go at 12:30 am to see what these were about. Again, thank God, Erica was staying over, so she could stay at the house with the kids (who were obviously sleeping but still need somebody there with them). We stayed at the hospital for about an hour and a half at which time the doctor basically said there isn't much they can do, especially since my cervix isn't changing (which is good news). So they gave me something to basically make me sleep and sent us home around 2:30 am, with the new instructions to call or come in when the contractions are "painful" and consistent and to just "ignore" the tightening ones that aren't changing my cervix. Easier said than done.

Talk about a whirl wind day. I know we need Babygan to "cook" at least a few more weeks but this up and down and not knowing and having to coordinate the kids is really tough on me (and probably Jim, too, but he can speak for himself). I think back to when all that happened with Finn and while it was the hardest thing I've ever been through, the part that was "easier" is we didn't have any other kids and it all happened at the beginning so there wasn't this back and forth (or at least it happened at the hospital so it wasn't on me to figure it out at home). I guess there really is a silver lining in every situation!

Basically, they want me to take it easy, which they've been telling me to do for several weeks now anyway. Limit stress as much as possible and keep track of how I'm feeling and any changes. So, all that hullabaloo with nothing to show for it. The bright side? Babygan and I are healthy and doing well, physically at least! My dreams of a "normal" pregnancy are officially over, but then again, they were just dreams as I knew it most likely wouldn't be the case. Oh, well. We'll figure it out. What's next?

Baby bump in the road

I had my 32 week OB check yesterday. First and foremost, my cervix has remained consistent for two weeks now, which is great news! And baby is sitting really high, which puts less pressure on my cervix, which is also great news. However, when the doctor measured my belly, it was showing significant grow in the last week, which caused my doctor some concern. She decided to move my growth ultrasound up two weeks in order for me to have that done yesterday evening, which I did. More on that in a second.

While I was trying to schedule that and figure out what to do with the kids, the results of my FFN test came back as positive. A positive FFN means you have a 25% chance that you will deliver the baby in the next 2 weeks. It isn't the worse results to get only because there is a high false positive with this test (BUT I had a negative result with Korri and still went into preterm labor, so it is what it is). Anyway, considering my history and recent developments, she had me come in last night for the first of two steroid shots. These shots are given 24 hours apart and help the baby's lungs mature. I'll go back in tonight for my second. Jim was happy to hear the steroids were being given as he's been asking about it as a precautionary measure for several weeks. Contractions continue but are not regular, however, are getting more "noticeable" than they have been the last few weeks!

After my shot, we went in for my ultrasound. I am SO thankful that Stacey and Dillon were able to meet us at the hospital for the ultrasound. The tech was needed in the ER, which means we were over half an hour late getting into the appt; so having company was much appreciated. Also, since Dillon was there and he is so grown up and mature at the ripe old age of 10, he "babysat" Finn in the lobby while Stacey, Korri and I went in for the ultrasound. That was a huge help, as Korri had enough questions on her own! I think she thought it was cool, even if she probably didn't really understand what she saw on the screen.

Basically, the doctor thought I was measuring 4.5 weeks big at my OB check, but based on the ultrasound, it is closer to 2.5 weeks, which is a big difference. Still, it makes sense that I'm measuring so large because my fluid levels is measuring at the 90% and baby is 86%! Big baby with lots of extra fluid makes for mommy having a big tummy! My goal is to actually make real efforts to eat as close to the diabetic diet (high protein; high fiber) as I can so that my eating habits don't contribute to an even bigger baby, but there is no guarantee this change will affect much.

Mentally and emotionally, I'm doing okay. I was pretty flustered yesterday when the FFN results came in, especially since Jim was in Chicago, but I felt better after the ultrasound. Even though we are still early, we know we can handle whatever comes our way at this point (thanks, Finn!). I'm so thankful that we continue to hear that baby is healthy and has no health risks. The hardest part for me, especially over the last couple of weeks, is not knowing. If somebody could just tell me when I'll go into labor and what complications I may have...it would be so much easier. Duh! I guess every pregnant lady probably wishes that...most just don't have to start wishing that as early as I legitimately do. Anyway, here's hoping for at least 2 more weeks but ideally 4 - 5 more weeks before baby decides to arrive.

I have pictures from the ultrasound but can't figure out how to install the scanner's drivers on Jim's computer. I guess that will have to wait for another day...I don't need the added stress! Technology. Argh.

And because I like posts with a picture, mommy and Gangan snuggling this morning:

Bed update: we bought a new King bed last Monday and it will be delivered on Tuesday! I am beyond excited for it to get here as it will give us much more "snuggle" room in the mornings and allow me to put my poor swollen feet up more!

Getting there

I had an OB check today (31 weeks and 1 day) and things are okay. Let me back up to last week. I'd been feeling pretty good, so I wasn't expecting anything but a quick check with a "you're good to go" at my regular two week OB check last week. I had the fortunate experience of bringing both kids with me by myself (as Jim was traveling)...but it wasn't as bad as I thought it was going to be. Anyway, when she checked me, she took longer than normal and finally said that I was at a 1. Hmmm...like my cervis length is 1cm or I'm dilated to a 1. The latter. Great...AND 25% effaced. I was completely caught off guard but we agreed that I would take it easy this week and come back in one week for a recheck to see if things had progressed at all.

This diagnosis isn't necessarily "bad" news, just what happens after is what matters. Well, I woke up Friday at 6:45 with consistent contractions about 15-20 minutes apart and finally called the doctor at 8:30. They weren't overly concerned and by 9:30 or so, they were further apart and seemed to be going away. I was a little disappointed with the response time by my doctor but I'd spoken with her nurse so I knew my doctor was aware of the situation. Basically, they went away and there was no reason for me to go in for monitoring.

All week I've had what I call consistently inconsistent contractions. Not overly painful but definitely noticeable. I was NOT expecting a good appointment today for my recheck. Jim was able to go with for this appt, which means the two rugrats got to come along again (they are getting to be professional helpers!). She checked me again and THANK GOD there has been no change...which is what we wanted to see. While she is aware that checking my cervix can actually cause contractions, the benefit of knowing my progress was more important, at least at this point in the pregnancy. So, basically status quo for now. I feel a lot better that there hasn't been any progress toward labor and feel like I can breathe a little bit (I didn't realize I'd been proverbially holding it all week!).

I'm schedule for my "regular" 2 week check next week, so I guess we'll see then! For now, it seems that baby is staying put. I'm still measuring 3 weeks bigger than I should be but it is staying consistent so she isn't overly concerned. We will know more about that at my 34 week ultrasound.

Clearly seeing?

This afternoon Korri had her 6 month eye check.  The last one we had was great so I wasn't expecting much different this time. That is when they always get you isn't it? When you are least prepared.

Anyway, Korri was a champ and did everything that was asked of her despite her distracting brother being in the room. This was not a dilation appt so basically they were just looking to see how her prescription was doing. That is fine.

However, her right eye has worsened since her last appointment, which means her brain is starting to favor her left eye again! Argh. For now, they didn't think it was necessary to start patching again but stressed how important it is that she wear her glasses every waking moment, which she is pretty good about doing. We will reassess in 6 months at which time they will do the full appointment including dilation. I really really hope it doesn't come to that but I guess it wouldn't be the end of the world and we will cross that bridge if/when we get to it.

Since we were in town (i.e. the Cities area) we had a play date with our friends Ms. Sharon, Laena, Braeland, Ms. Pam, Lilly, Levi, Ms. Mary Pat, and Bennie at a park near our eye clinic in SLP. It was beautiful weather and a great time was had by all. Hope we can do more of those this summer.

Baby Steps

On Saturday we participated in the fourth annual Baby Steps 3K walk. All proceeds from the walk benefited the neonatal program at Children's Mpls, including the neonatal intensive care unit (NICU), infant care center (ICC), special care nursery (SCN), and more. We were grateful to have Grandma Kathy, auntie Kristine and Zander join us. We couldn't have asked for better weather as it was in the upper 70's (maybe a little humid) but with an occasional breeze. And most importantly, the rain held off until we were on our way home from the event!

On Friday I got clearance from my doctor that I was cleared to walk with the stipulation that I didn't try to beat anyone! LOL. So on that note, we decided not to bring a stroller because Korri would probably go about the pace that I would need to set for myself. She struggled a bit with the heat and distance but with a group effort, she made it just fine...as did I. Although my fingers were super swollen by the time we finished. Oh, well.

After the walk, they host a party for the walkers including lunch, Radio Disney and lots of games, activities and bouncy houses. Jim and I decided it was best for me to just sit and watch but the kids had a lot of fun on the activities. I felt like this was the first year where they were big enough (or maybe brave enough?) to actually participate.

We've said it so much in the past and we will most likely say it many times in the future, but we are so thankful and appreciative of our family and friends who have and continue to support us. Thank you so much for each and every donation and for those that weren't able to donate but joined us in spirit...we are grateful. This year was a bit reflective for me since we are trying to make sure that Babygan doesn't need these services...yet it is so reassuring and a good reminder that they are available, if we do.

Here are a few pics from the wonderful event:

If you planned on donating and never got around to it, there is still time: Team Finnegan's website

Insurance? What insurance?

I'm sure you can all relate and I just need to vent. After spending 3 to 4 hours on the phone yesterday, Jim and I have realized that our insurance would rather we NOT get the preventative prenatal care that is considered necessary by the experts treating me and they would rather us deliver early and spend over $1 million like they did when Finn was born! I DON'T get it. We are being "penalized" because we are being proactive in our health care needs. In essence, they are punishing those of us who preemptively are trying to save them money in the long run. Don't get me wrong, my motive is to have a healthy baby NOT save them money but the actions I am taking WILL save them money.

I was on the phone with my old clinic and the insurance company for 2 hours (and got hung up on once) until I got to the point where my blood pressure was so high, I had to hand it over to Jim or risk going into labor (ironic, isn't?). Jim was then on the phone for another hour or more and basically, nothing was resolved. The kicker of the deal is that when you look up our benefits online, it says no co-payment is required after the initial OB doctor visit including prenatal care, delivery, postnatal care and any related complications. Black and white. But nothing is "black and white" when it comes to insurance. They are charging me a co-payment for EVERY VISIT I've had since starting ultrasounds and injections! I could spit fire. If I didn't worry about the well being of my unborn child, I would stop all "high risk care" and then let them figure out the expenses of care when baby is born. So ridiculous.

I guess "it is just money" but when money is tight and you only have one income (when you are used to two), it IS a big deal. Argh. If you can't tell, I HATE insurance companies. They are such a scam.

Breathe easier

Ha, a play on words! We are now 28 weeks and the reason we are so happy to get to this milestone? This is the point during pregnancy when the baby's lungs are able to absorb oxygen and the baby starts manufacturing surfactant, a substance that allows the lungs to expand and collapse. By no means does it mean things would be easy sailing from here if baby were to be born but it is HUGE for the infant mortality rate to get beyond this milestone. Hooray!

I had an OB check today. We talked about a lot of things but the good news is that my cervix appears to be in great shape...closed, somewhat firm and no external funneling. My OB is concerned about how big I'm getting so early and possibly the size of the baby. This is contradictory to what the perinatologist said two weeks ago (she had NO concerns), so I don't know how concerned I should be about it. Basically, she wants me to eat a diet high in protein and veggies so that we don't run into another issue where baby is TOO big! If I continue to get bigger (which I'm sure I will, duh!), she will probably schedule regular ultrasounds to monitor baby and also my uterus...there is only so much room in there! Sheesh...it is always something.

Waiting for results of the FFN test, but expecting it to be negative, which is good!

*UPDATE* FFN was negative! Should be "safe" for two more weeks!

SEVEN days!

Last night was the night...Finn has been dry and accident free at night for one full week...seven days! He is SO proud of himself, as are we.

It has taken just over 4 months but we finally made it. And the best thing is that he has started waking up and taking himself potty...which I think is a good sign that he is really starting to "get" it. We will see what the next few days/weeks brings but we are super happy and proud of our GanGan! The deal is that he gets to pick "anything" once he made it one week...and it sounds like he is picking Chuck E Cheese. Boo...mommy hates that place, but daddy and the kids will have fun!

On another Finn note, I posted of Facebook but wanted to share here too...Finn found a neighbor friend this past weekend, Max! Max is in kindergarten (so one year older than Finn) and lives three houses down.

I am SO happy to finally find a neighbor that my kids can play with. No little girl yet for Korri but she doesn't mind tagging along, for now. They rode bikes for two hours Saturday morning. Max's mom drew an obstacle course on the road with sidewalk chalk, complete with a gas station and tiring changing station! So creative and the boys loved it. I also love how quickly little kids, especially boys, make friends. They have a common interest, riding bikes, and that is all that matters. I may live to regret this as I've heard, "Is Max outside? Can I go play with Max? When will Max be outside?" about 100 times since Saturday morning, but for now, it is music to my ears! Happy summer days to come.

Happy Mother's Day

Overall, I had a great Mother's Day. I have to say, Jim sure knows how to do it right! He got up at 7am with the kids and kept them downstairs until 9am, at which time he brought up breakfast in bed for all of us. He made scrambled eggs, bacon, homemade jumbo blueberry muffins and fresh squeezed juice.

The kids gave me a necklace they made at preschool (which Finn promptly put on and wouldn't let me wear) and Jim got me a membership to a CSA! I was so surprised and beyond happy since Jim never really seemed to be into it before. If you don't know what a CSA is (I didn't either until all my trendy Minneapolis friends told me about it!), it stands for Community Supported Agriculture. Basically, you buy into "shares" of a farm and in return you receive a weekly box of local, seasonal food directly from a farmer. I am like a kid at Christmas...I can't wait to get our first box (which I THINK will be the first week of June).

Side note: last week a member of the church came over to explain some things about St. Mary's and the congregation (I submitted our membership form a couple weeks ago)...so it was basically a "welcome" visit. He asked if I had any questions and one was about how the kids all left mass at the beginning and came back right before communion. What was this? Could any kids go? Was there an age limit" Etc. He basically made it sound like it was the church's form of Sunday School.

Back to yesterday after my wonderful breakfast and gifts, we all headed to church. When they called the kids to the front of the church, with little hope of them actually participating, I asked Finn and Korri if they wanted to go to "Church Class." Korri said yes right away and after some encouragement, Finn agreed as well. Jim and I were skeptical but hopeful. All the kids filed out and even though Finn was pushing Korri the whole time, they left and stayed the entire time! Jim and I got SO much more out of church with them gone. I really hope this is a trend to come. Honestly, I think them going to the class was my best Mother's Day gift possible!

When we got home, Jim made Eggs Benedict, even though he was partially lame after having broken his finger yesterday. Oh, yeah. We had to take a trip to the ER Saturday afternoon after Jim smashed his finger between a cement block and a rock.

It ended up being broken and was extremely painful (and continued to fill up with blood...gross!). Glad we went in, but there is so little they can do. Basically, he is in a splint for "several" weeks and is taking pain killer as needed. Hopefully the pain will start to dissipate soon. I've gotten really good at securing his splint.

So after lunch, Jim worked out in the garden for most of the afternoon and evening. He HAND TILLED it! That is crazy, especially considering I'm pretty sure nobody had actually planted something in there for several years (seemed to be overrun with strawberries and raspberries). The kids "helped" daddy and by bath time, they were all covered in dirt! A good spring day, I'd say. Now we just need to plant and wait for our harvest!

Enough about me. I want to thank our two wonderful mothers and wish them an extra special Mother's Day. We are so lucky to have your in our lives, and while you helped shape us into the adults we are today, we are especially grateful for the grandmothers' you are to our kids. And while DeAnn isn't either of our mothers, she is as close to a grandma to my kids as you can get. We appreciate you so much. I'd also like to thank all the women in our lives who are mothers, grandmothers and especially Kelsie, Becky and Renae...the godmothers to Finn and Korri. Our kids have so much love in their lives and it is mainly due to the influences of all of you wonderful women. I'd also like to thank all of their partners (and mine!) because let's face it...without our big boys caring and trying, Mother's Day would just be another day! Happy Mother's Day!

We make big babies

I had a growth scan ultrasound this morning at the MN Perinatologist office. This was a follow up to my level 2 ultrasound when they were a little concerned about my levels of amniotic fluids being high. A huge thank you to Stacey for sitting in as Jim's proxy, as Jim had travel that he couldn't change.

First and foremost...Babygan is doing great with no concerns! Fluid levels are still high (95%) but all the reasons of something wrong with baby that could be causing it were basically ruled out. Babygan has grown considerably since the level 2 and is now in the 75% (abdomen in the 80th...my kids have big bellies!)! Basically she said it is as simple as big babies make more fluid. She said there is nothing for me to do differently and is happy with the size of the baby. While I don't like the idea of going full term and birthing a "huge" baby out my hoo-ha...I do like the idea of baby being big, especially if we go a little early. So good news.

My cervix was 3cm long (NOT to be confused with dilated), which the perinatologist said was good. I still to have reservations about it continuing to thin, but I keep getting told not to worry. The tech said it was starting to funnel (she didn't use that term but I can't remember exactly what she said, maybe beaking) but only on the interior side and not to worry (there's that word again). They did not do a manual exam of the cervix.

Upon Jim's request, I asked if we have preterm labor, should we go to Buffalo Hospital, which is closest or go directly to Abbott, which is further but has higher level of care. She said to go to the closest hospital. It is most important for them to start whatever treatment as soon as possible and then transfer me than run the risk of "not making it" to the hospital if we went to Abbott. Yikes! Guess that answers that question. Maybe we won't need to worry about it and we'll have an August baby...

Babygan's face...there's that chin again!

Babygan was "talking to the hand" with hand in front of face (profile with hand at top of pic)!

As a testament to Jim and me making big babies, Finn was 1 lb 15 oz and they were expecting him to be around 1 lb 6 oz...HUGE difference when you are that small! And Korri was three weeks early and weighed 7.5 pounds. They estimated that her 40 week weight would have been 9 lbs! Ouch.