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Nearly half a million babies (1 in 10) are born premature in the US each year which is higher than that of most other developed nations. This is the journeys of our first born son, Finnegan, who was born 14 weeks early and weighed only 1 pound 15 ounces at birth. Of our daugher, Korrigan, who was born a healthy 7 pounds, 7 ounces at 37 weeks. And of our second son, MacKeegan, who was also born at 37 weeks at a whopping 8 pounds, 13 ounces. Our continued adventures reminds us daily how good God is.

Thursday, February 3

Tough day

I have to say, I'm overwhelmed today. We had a doctor appointment for Korri for a weight check and bilirubin level test that lasted over THREE hours and should not have lasted more than an hour, including lab and waiting for the results. By the time we left, I was so engorged, I could barely carry anything, let alone focus on anything other than the need to pump. They weighed her first and she has lost another ounce (now at 6 lbs, 12 oz). Overall, an ounce in two days isn't terrible, but she should be gaining weight right now, not losing (brought me right back to when Finn was 6 months old and losing weight when we stopped supplementing with Neosure). On the good side, Korri's bilirubin levels have improved, although she is still yellow, so not sure if there is reason for future follow up or not. We have her 2-week well child appointment next Wednesday with our regular pediatrician.

While Jim took Korri to get her labs, Finn and I stayed at Children's to I wouldn't have to walk around so much. While we were waiting, Dr. Mackey saw us and stopped over. So, of course, I start bawling uncontrollably. She asked a few questions and quickly told me that all of these things are very common and should be easily fixed.

Also, I realized over the last day or so that the "baby blues" have hit. With Finn, I had them the day after giving birth. We are on day four with Korri, so I thought they would pass me by this time, but not so lucky. I am an emotional person by nature anyway, however, I am not a big crier, so bursting into massive tears for little reasons is tough. The lack of sleep is also catching up with me, so I'm sure that doesn't help with the emotions.

It isn't helping that the reason for Korri's lack of weight gain is her inability to successfully latch on and when she does, it is a shallow latch, which means she isn't getting very much anyway. I know it isn't "me" per se, but it is so hard when I'm the one feeding her and I feel like if I "just got it" so would she. Every time she has a bad feeding, it hurts me so much (well, both physically and mentally). But tonight, she has had two really good feedings and I pumped until my breasts were finally starting to soften a little bit. So, I guess we'll see. Oh, and they scheduled a lactation consultation tomorrow for Korri and me, so I'm hoping that will help, too. One day at a time, I know. These things may all be very normal, but they are also overwhelming when you are already going through such a big life adjustment.

1 comment:

Lisa Q said...

hang in there Stacy - you are right, this is a tough time of adjustment. You can do it! Praying for strength for you.